He is trying to lose some weight before the LO gets here. People with drinking problems do no slow their drinking down just "because" nor do they consider how their drinking will affect the other people in their lives. OR MAYBE you've been putting it off for awhile and you're doing it because you know you need to stop procrastinating! Tell him your concerns rationally and lovingly, and if he doesn't listen you have your answer as to the best course of action for you and your child on the day of labor and beyond. My husband was asleep in the chair and when they woke him up, he walked over to me and said, My foot hurts. REALLY? Have you ever told him that? I am not saying what your DH is doing is right, in fact, I think 5 drinks every night is a bit heavy and you should talk to him about it. Two days later, he picked us up from the hospital and wanted me to make eggplant parmesan from scratch cause we had a new oven. Help her stay focused and relaxed. What on earth makes you think anyone wants your man? pinterest.com. Heres the thing. I'm so sorry that you are going through this, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. But he's probably young enough where that can all be avoided if he changes his patterns NOW. Frankly this scares me. I was laying on the bed playing And E was sitting in my desk chair. When I mentioned this is really beginning to hurt, his comment? -Parisa, When it was time to go to the hospital, my husband said he needed to shower and shave first. My husband was working at the lake (20 min away) and was rushing home to change and come to the hospital. Home Depot arrived to install our oven shortly after my water broke we made it to the hospital 5 hours later, had a beautiful 17 hours of labor and he left cause he couldnt get any rest. for fear that he would pass out. husband drunk when i went into labor. Then he is hungry and is trying to make a sandwich and I inform him it is time to leave for the hospital. He told me later he was definitely buzzed but me waking him up was the most sobering thing ever. At first he acted like I was over reacting but later apologized and agreed with me. The nurse ran out of room because she couldnt handle it. I had to go to the hospital for a D&C with my first pregnancy as the baby stopped growing and there was no heartbeat, but I didnt miscarriage automatically. So if he wont agree to give up the drinks then you should have someone as a backup coach that can stand in for him. Experiencing a craving for alcohol. My husband was behind me holding me up while I squatted when a nurse looked at him funny and said You dont look so hot. Money was scarce. Yo Ass don't git a medal fo' marryin yo' prom date. I would talk to him on a day he doesn't work like people said, and maybe keep a taxi service on speed dial. Oh well, possibly because it was the day before I gave birth to our 3rd child, Jack. You can't drive yourself, and if he's been drinking that much then you are taking cab. He was only slightly better with our third. Drink Red Raspberry Leaf Tea. My doctor walked in while he was talking, looked at me still laying on the delivery bed, and told my husband he should probably take care of that later. Im in labor! ** Babies shouldn't be born wit thangs ** Ive got girlfriends who pretty much just lay it all on the table. It doesn't matter if its wine instead of hard drinks, the point is the dependency. But when he does, he is belligerant and can't stop and just a few. If we go anywhere and he has more than 2 drinks I drive home. Someone who drinks 5 drinks a night to "unwind" after work and is defending that decision in the face of being incapacitated for their pregnant wife has a drinking problem. At 9 am, contractions really kicked in and still no hubby. He happily, obliviously goes back to work. Your water better not break on my leather seats!. I went into labor while he was sitting in the bay, alone in a boat. 1 Answer. I thought he was bad, but now I see he was just average. Get on the same page, then bring up how you are afraid alcohol could affect that. Mortified. I mean PISSED. Labor and delivery for Baby #3 were pretty uneventful, but I made it clear that I considered being in the hospital a vacation of sorts. I shoot him a look and he says oh, I thought you would drive. I was 7cm dilated when they checked me in. I think your husband should be able to handle 3-5 weeks of not drinking in exchange for a healthy baby and wife. Sharing your thoughts and feelings with your spouse can help both of you cope with the emotional effects of recovering from addiction. After being in labor all day and delivering at 9:00 at night we got almost no sleep. My husband devours some of the Popeyes chicken and then comes back in and sits with me and then falls asleep. So, feeling AOK, we walked up the hill to the party, socialised and I left Phil to continue cooking sausages and shooting the shit and took the other two kids home around midnight. First, would he normally drive after 5 drinks? My husband was beyond perfect. Many, many people struggle with this same issue, and there is help available if he chooses to use it. When they called my room at 3 am to go nurse her, my husband declined to go with me because he was just so tired after everything that happened that day. Rachell, I was in labor all night and ready to go in the morning. You'd like to get my newsletter! Alcoholism is a serious addiction that can affect both the addict and those around them. Oh, yeah, I am sure he will slow it down. I said we didnt have that kind of time that Id gone from 5cm-8cm in 35 minutes. He doesn't drink that much EVERY night, but it happens, and I just KNOW with my luck, he will drink that much on the night I go into labor. The biggest sign that the bloody show has occurred is you may notice a bloody mucus discharge from your vagina. -Amy, Mine watched TV with his face pressed against the screen because he couldnt hear it over my pain noises! Your scenario of DH's drinking hits so close to home for me. 20 Tips to Deal With Unresolved Issues in a Relationship, 10 Signs Being in a Relationship With an Alcoholic Partner, A therapist or counselor will be able to help him, 10 Ways to Support Your Spouse in Addiction Recovery, 15 Ways to Improve Emotional Support in Your Relationship, Individuals with alcoholism may have a number of behavioral and emotional characteristics, including a lack of self-confidence and. It is also important to seek professional marriage counseling if you need help handling your marriage with a spouse trying to overcome addiction. When I was born my Dad was on a fishing trip. Sept. 28, 2016. this is fantastic!! With our second things went pretty well. What would you do? Hubby was very excited and solicitous and kept asking how I was and what did I need. My dear husband decides its a good idea to take a work call on the bluetooth/speakers in the car! The next contraction, I look over to see him asleep. Mine wasnt nearly as bad as these more just funny. They can give you tips and suggestions on dealing with an alcoholic husband and the challenges that can arise during the recovery process. He did later apologize. He called the hospital and they said theyd call him as soon as anything happened. Whos really stupid? Telling my sister that if we needed her, to call the house where he would be at and someone would give him a message, since he didnt think the baby would be born for quite a while. DH managed to get to the hospital after his work in time to give me a quick kiss and be kicked out for delivery. When one starts living with a functioning alcoholic husband, they try to take control of situations, as mentioned above, and behave as a counselor. Hes a genius. When I woke up after the operation, the nurses unceremoniously kicked me out, but because I didnt have a cellphone, I couldnt call him and I didnt have my own transport. Are there any good books for hubby that explain the importance of truly supporting the wife? My experience is pretty tame compared to most of these! -Tifffany, My husband took so many pictures of himself in the scrubs and mask (obviously super important to document) the camera battery was almost dead when we actually had the baby! -Jennifer, We were out to a movie when my contractions started. Its never easy to be with an alcoholic husband, but these things can surely help. but this isn't just within my relationships i'd say it's with friendships and working environment - REALLY envy those that have any guts to say what they feel. Did you have a birth plan? You notice a mucusy discharge or "bloody show". I think you should talk with him about this (perhaps a counselor as well if talking to him alone won't work? ! lol But overall, he was my rock through both of my labors and he never left my side, so I guess I cant complain too much. I don't believe Alcoholics Anonymous is very effective, personally, but it's free and the meetings are plentiful, so it might be a good place to start. I woke up at 2 am when my water broke, shook my husband awake and told him. I complained to my husband at 3 am in the morning that I was experiencing a lot of sharp pain. Since our house is on the way to the hospital, we stopped to get our bags. Thanks for the laughs though! Preterm labor can be risky for you and your baby. My husband stopped drinking the first week in April. Mum had gone in to hospital and he was working. Ask the medical staff questions. He hasn't had one drink since that night because he knows I'm serious. Have you ever discussed this with friends and inquired about how much their husbands drink? . Also I am not a screamer, and when the contractions were fierce like that, I would just lay on my side, tightly gripping the bed rail, sometimes whimpering quietly as I waited for it to pass. I dont thnk so, Omgi cant stop laughing at the thong.Im in tears here Second, I would have an honest conversation about the role you want him to play in labor and delivery. I get all the credit for being an awesome stepdad and none of the crap over what got screwed up during labor. I was in delivery with my second child in 12 months. Must have been all that digesting he was doing :S. Im currently being induced in 9 days, my husband actually says hes going to stay home for the fucking dog! Most nights he drinks to the point of stumbling, and not . Or speaking to each other in limited statements, such as Jack just shat his pants or the toilet is blocked. Haha! I went into labor at 10:30am Saturday morning and, this being my first child, I didnt know it. Water Breaking Is a (Damn Obvious) Sign of Labor. We went for a lot of walks. Around 10 am he announces that he has to go home because the Popeyes he ate has given him food poisoning. We asked around and found 10 different ways women knew they were in labor. So, accept the fact and learn to deal with it. He's in sales and always has social work meetings where drinks are served, too, which doesn't help. The following morning,he woke up very early and went to work! Your rights as a patient supecedes his right to violate your peace and privacy. He was about 4 minutes from the hospital but after 20 minutes he stillhadnt shown up. If your husband is an alcoholic, make every effort to avoid situations that are triggers for drinking. Husband, I swear by my ugly faded hospital gown, I will end you. They might have difficulties controlling their emotions and be prone to anger or violent behavior when drunk. I dont know why I remember things like that. When he got home, he dropped his phone in a stock pot that was soaking in the sink. It's just that the cumulative effect of 4-5 drinks from 5pm until 10 or 11 makes me worry. It wasnt until I went into labor in the middle of the night that I realized he dropped the ball. My daughters dad (who fortunately I had the good sense never to marry) kept his distance from me the last month or so of my pregnancy, which probably is what kept me from delivering in prison, but he wanted to be at the hospital for the birth. I had a hellish time trying to breastfeed my newborn son (turns out he had a tongue thrust issue and didnt latch on until he was 5 weeks old ) and in the middle of the hospital room, amidst lactation consultants and even a sucking specialist , my husband announces : Honey, let me show you, this is how you do it. Life with an alcoholic husband is tough. My son is adopted but we were able to be at the birth. Thanks! He was drinking coffee, eating breakfast and taking care of the dogs because they were going to be caged up all day. Second baby he was pretty good, except for when I would have a contraction (went through natural labors each time, no epidural, very little IV medication), he would look at the screen and say wow, that one went off the charts! and I would say you dont have to say that each time, Im going through it! I was sleeping when suddenly cramped stood up and my water broke. E had a little trouble at first and I needed stitches, so DH stayed with us until 2am before he ran home to let our dogs out to go to the bathroom and he never did tell me if he needed to clean anything up while he was there! Yeah. While crawling along, my contractions got closer together and longer. And yeahshe figured it out and got him out quickly after that, but he was deeply bruised and as a result had terrible jaundice, needing bili blankets through the fifth day and had muscular trauma in his neck that he needed therapy to correct for two years afterward. If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married. -- A pregnant doctor unexpectedly went into early labor while delivering another woman's child. -Carrie, My husband rested the magazine he was reading on my legs while I lay dying WITHOUT an epidural. When I was younger and unmarried, I had a boyfriend who was often kind of rude to me in social situations. Hes pretty lucky the epidural finally kicked in halfway through their lunch date! It really hurts. I replied, What the fuck is wrong with you? Then he gets home and wants a couple more glasses of wine. My dad went out for tacos! Or even if it wasnt, theres still a little bit of schadenfreude involved isnt there? My husband fell in a deep sleep and would not wake up to me calling him. First baby: Yes. Then 14 hours and a baby boy later, he called to let everyone at the office (a family business) know the good news. I dont find I get the opportunity to maintain the rage nearly as much as I once did. Im straight, but if I ever go into labor Ill probably wish I had a wife. He never slept even when I did (due to pain meds, epidural didnt work) for 27 hours. Last week, I made a simple request on the Mommy Shorts fanpage. Look up the options available to you, enlisting help if you need backup, and have a hopeful, serious plan ready so there's no excuse for him to say no. Just have a back-up plan ready so you don't need to stress about himmaybe a family member lives close by? With our third, he asked me to stretch out the pushing for 55 minutes so he would win the money pot at work. Stand with them and help them overcome it. Raspberry leaf tea is supposed to help with uterine contractions, reported Pregnancy, Birth & Beyond, though there's some contradictory evidence as to whether or not it . Why would you say that to me in THE THROES OF LABOR? After 26 hours of Oxytocin induced labour our son arrived and my hubby had the balls to say jokingly Well, at least we know hes hers! There was never any doubt about paternity, it was just his stupid sense of humour. This is not an average, it is the maximum recommended amount for any given day. All for a free parking spot!!! However, this might give you peace of mind for a moment. Lucky for him, he was standing just out of my reach.
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