but he also has to somehow be her first and that if she has a . I have practically needed a crowbar to pry information out of my wife about her past. She said she has had quite a wild sexual past. Take her on dates, and treat them as opportunities to get to know her better, her hopes and dreams, the woman she is, and the woman she wants to become. Anyway, we drove to the nearby park to talk. He has apparently had several affairs. Her past is no indication of her cheating on you. i am sure if she could go back and redo her past she would. My wife lied about her past | Talk About Marriage Our intimacy was never the same. By that I mean she really is the person you observed for the last 8 years. On the very first day of . It took me several years to kiss her again and even longer to make love to her. Plenty of people like hearing details from their partner's sexual past—or present, for that matter. I have been with my boyfriend for almost 7 months now. Amy Dickinson . Lying in marriage is quite common, and the women who lie are usually doing it to spare their husbands' feelings. A friend told me about my wife's sexual past - and now I ... Xper 4. And the more you try to find out, the more you will focus on it. A man on Reddit recently became engaged to his fiancée, a woman he met on a dating app two years ago. Archived. Why do women always lie about there sexual past ... Dear Mary: I can't get over she lied about her sexual past ... My Gf Lied To Me About Her Past. Should I Trust Her? Or ... Women will make up lies about where they have been, or will just hide the entire event, to prevent their spouse from knowing they saw their old flame. You have every right to find her previous behavior unappealing. j7653. My wife lied to me about being a virgin and I think about ... I still don't know a lot about my wife's past. Published: 19:59 EDT, 2 November 2012 | Updated: 19:59 EDT, 2 November 2012 9 years ago. My wife lied to me about her past love life. When I pulled up the web, there it was pictures, letters, etc. I Learned My Wife Lied About Her Past And I Don't Know ... I have lied about my past to someone I love very much and broke trust. My wife is lying to me about her affair - Since You Asked I'm 29, married this year. When we met, I was a virgin. Question: I am a married man with two kids. One night we went out with one of her freinds who said girls should never let . My new wife lied about Past Physical Affairs. Dealing With Spouse's Past Promiscuity. | Talk About Marriage She made a mistake, which doesn't make her a bad person. Should I Separate or Stay? it will take time to regain trust. What should matter is if she is STD free. "My Wife Lied About Who She Was" - Dear Wendy If you can, it helps to try to see the situation from her perspective. Answer (1 of 17): It's not that easy, iff you explicitly mentioned before your wife during courtship that you need a girl with no past and/or past relationship is a deal breaker for you, then go on divorce her. They are 12 and 1.5 years old. 1 before we got married my wife had a lot of guy friends but said she NEVER crosses the line. She was a teenager and had asked me to wait until she was ready. she is more than likely ashamed , and regrets her past . When I first learned about some of her past it was after we were well into our engagement. 2 so I never asked her about her past upon that knowledge and we ended up getting married. I initially posted this in r/relationships, but they sent me here and told me it would be a better place to post. The only thing that concerns me about your post is that she continued a . Even decent, loving and considerate individuals mess up. I can guarantee that she is terrified right now of what you will do. My new wife lied about Past Physical Affairs. but author Lux Alptraum argues in her new book, "Faking It: The Lies Women Tell about Sex . wife of a year? To note, I was sexually assaulted and had a trust issue when we met, I shared my feelings that I did . My wife continues to lie about her past despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary. You know, when a man gets a lot of women in his bed, he is usually called a womanizer or a player. If you truly love your wife, you will find a way to make peace with her past and move on from this . i had this with my partner and it gets quite boring after awhile, . My prudish husband has left me because I lied about my sex life. But Dr. Jackson says you should learn a lot more about their past once you . The point is that the relationship was built on a lie. Accusing her of not being honest with him might cause her to shut down even more. read. Dear Carolyn: Even iff you never mentioned it, but are unable to get over it, even then divorce her. She'd been faithful ever since, but she'd lied to me for 12 years. j_5150 posted: I've been married for 10 years and recently I've learned more about my wife's past 'promiscuousness'. I asked her on 2 occasions after being introduced to her male "friends" that was quite the awkward outing. The sooner she knows what her options are, the better equipped she will be to make her decisions -- during which you can, and should, try in earnest to see in him what she sees. Her past is no indication of her cheating on you. Now you know and can't deal with it. jesus fucking christ. Reader's wife lied about the fact she had five or six lovers during her first marriage despite initially saying her ex-husband left her for a hidden l. 5 years ago. And although I agree that the past is the past and nobody should be judged by it I think that the point is being missed. Her past really isn't your business provided she's clean and you shouldn't have asked. However, a disagreement over their relationship's origin story has left . Your wife is hiding her past from you and being deliberately vague or contradictory, because , I bet, after 31 years she is sick and tired of having to be given the third grade by her own husband, she feels there's no use rehashing old ( and private ) scenarios, and very intelligently she does not want to give you fodder to feed your unhealthy . By Ellie Advice Columnist. Dear Amy: I'm a 31-year-old husband with a beautiful wife and two amazing little girls. Please don't let one minor mistake from 40 years ago ruin ALL your faith and trust in your wife and the years you've built a life with her. For some of us, one is too many. You can, and should, be angry at the lies. Our intimacy was never the same. ". I asked her what else she had lied about and said that I wanted to see proof regarding her past medical concern and proof that she made $200K a year at her old job. the fact that you're asking people on the internet to keep you level headed in dealing with this when this cunt is cackling over her past as part of a fucking gang of women who abused and mistreated vulnerable guys? What you learned of her past reinforces who she is today. I walked into our room and she had not closed out her last Internet session. My wife cheated on me for nearly a year before I caught them. By Ellie Advice Columnist. It has to do with my mother having been a raging whore, which hurt my sister and I terribly. There were plenty of other lies about her past that I found throughout her phone that just twist the knife even further. By Guest, 4 years ago on Dating. Question - (3 April 2012) : 14 Answers - (Newest, 21 December 2012): A male age 36-40, *r.goodguy writes: Alright let me first start out by giving you the basics ok my wife and I have been togather 6 years 5years married ,we have 3 kids she had two when we met but the dad was a loser in and out of prison and gangster deadbeat so I became there dad and loved every minute of it ,they were 5 and . The more you focus on her past, the worse it will become. you love her, and you have two kids. I brushed the revelations aside and said it's in the past and had nothing to do with us now, the present and future. Stoya : It's 2020. And the more you try to find out, the more you will focus on it. Now, my ex-wife was in fact a deeply deceptive and dishonest person within our entire . view in app . Had she told the truth from the start, I probably could have looked past it. You may not care how many men screwed your wife, but many men do. I caught my wife in an affair 7 years ago. When I did learn more about her past, after 30 years, I really wondered who she was. My husband just filed for divorce over my sexual history. She'll lie to anyone in order not to be caught…OR to justify her actions if she is caught. It has cut me to the bone to learn that . It makes her human. At the beginning of our relationship, we both told each other how many sexual partners we'd had before. We seem to be getting back on track but I cannot seem to get over some new things that I learned about her sexual past. The more you focus on her past, the worse it will become. My wife has cheated and lied to me repeatedly throughout our relationship; My wife has cheated and lied to me repeatedly throughout our relationship. Some would say a woman's past isn't her husband's business. She'll lie to her husband as long as she can. At 16 she lost her virginity on a one night stand with a new guy in town. That is not something she could fake. Bothered by wifes sexual past. My girlfriend recently went on 4 day vacation to see one of her favorite bands on a cruise ship. you deserve better. Nothing as it is her past! DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN we first got together, my wife told me she was a virgin like me. I have a problem with my wife's past. Tease her. Then he confronts his wife about it and its only then she speaks up that yes she had wild past before marraige but she regrets it and now does'nt want to remember it, so she lied to him as he being . The Things My Wife and Her Lover Did. This has some layers to it so I'll try to list the bullet points. We made love finally two days later, and afterward she was very distant, but tried to be reassuring. No matter if the person is wrong for giving you the . +1 y. I guess girls who lie about it are scared of being judged. She said" He was more worried about getting off than making her first time more enjoyable. Twelve years into our 48-year marriage I learned my wife lied to me about her sexual past. Your wife, however, didn't handle this situation well. you deserve better. Obviously you knew it would be a problem since past experiences weren't disclosed. Tell your wife that you lied about disposing the box, show her the files, and delete them immediately if she instructs you to. Two years ago, my wife reached out to an . I think she knew that and that's why she lied. Her initial reaction was again to lie to me, but after several moments she admitted that she lied about the images and that they were not her. End of dialog window. I found letters that confirms my Wife lied about past, she will not discuss. It was very important to me when we were dating that I not marry a slut. because she regrets her past, she did not want to take a chance of losing you, and lied about it. get the fuck out, man. Tell her that you're having a hard time dealing with the fact that you've lied to her about this, and ask her to see an MC with you. That lie, I'd say a little white lie, wasn't meant to hurt you, it was to protect herself. I met my wife 7 years ago, she was extremely picky when it came to sex. When we met, I was a virgin. If They Lie About Their Past. I lied about the number of my past sexual partners. It's hurt our marriage ever since: Ask Ellie. We have no children, but were planning on starting to try in 2017. I grew up on a farm, my family were good people but unlike my wife's. I met her when she was hired where I work. My wife and I have been married for six years. She came and picked me up. She didn't do it intentionally to screw you over. He was lied to. Be curious and playful. EDIT: shut off the caring for . Once while talking about ourselves during our courtship she shared that she was in a relationship and it was just a casual relationship. She was a teenager and had asked me to wait until she was ready. The best solution, like others have said, is not to even think about it. 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